Screaming silently, quietly, piercing my noise
Please stop hurting me, I can’t start hurting myself, not again
But her shrill squeals skin my sanity and peels my masks away
Collapsing, cool floor icy cold and ragdoll comes to mind. Little puppet breaking and cracking, splinters.
Hot liquid, lava pooling and quickly coagulating, slide and tremble
Please no more how do I stop how I do keep going, how do I not break when she screams and screams.
Lies lies lies please, enough, just give me back the masks of determination. Please
I can do it, I promise, the stakes are way too high, the loss too deep.
Just please let me concentrate, let me obey, let me listen and not hurt, stop screaming and throwing me off.
Stop bringing back the depression. Stop bringing back the cloying clotting parasitic wailing emptiness.